So is it bad that I'm using this 21 year old for his hot bod and utter naivety?
No its what 21 year olds are made for
So explain to me again how you wake up next to a Brazilian model and I wake up next to a turkey sub? And a jar of grey poupon.
i waited two years for her to sleep with me. it just didnt seem worth it.
she lost her virginity three hours after you dumped her.
are you serious?
just found the land before time on youtube... I'm so fucked for finals
We have a guy passed out in the bathroom with one of our pots. Not sure if he's your friend so I let him be
Dude I live in a fucking closet and still get laid every weekend. Figure it out.
I feel like just to watch it, I need to be high. To understand it, I'd need enough drugs to kill an elephant.
You go to bars with sophisticated older men, I steal lawn ornaments. Priorities
So much rum. So many feels.
But I REALLY want to hide my crazy for as long as possible with him so he'll date me.
I'm about to make existential crisis tacos.
At what point can I admit that I hate going to house parties?
I don't wanna stand in your shitty kitchen making small talk while I guard the quality booze I brought.
Uhm I have a bottle of tequila, a gallon of orange juice, and leggings. Now ask me again how hard im going? And that doesn't cover tomorrow.
she has no right to get mad at us for drinking during the wedding. she's the one that chose the bridesmaid dresses with pockets.
HE'S FUCKING 19 YEARS OLD, HE CAN'T EVEN GET INTO A BAR WITH ME, WHAT MAKES YOU THINK I'LL LET HIM IN MY PANTS?!
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