You'd love this place it's beautiful. Plus these people smell like garlic
ive had 594 apples! thats 99 apples 6 times! math!
i was sitting in the back seat of her car with her boyfriend while she was driving. it was pretty awkward, but i dont think "so my dick's been in your girl's mouth too" was a good ice breaker
I don't know what the fuck is in the water in New Hampshire, but these dicks are HUGE.
i havent blinked in 235 seconds. now 247. now 258. 263. 267. 271. i also have been gifted with theability to both type and count and not blink. 293 so magical
Shit. I'm running the whole hotel right now. The front desk girl had to run home because she left her vibrator on the counter and her brother, mom, and grandmother surprised her and are showing up to her place before she gets off work. This will end badly no matter what.
I know he is still a student. I am not asking if his being an underwear model makes it more ethical, just less prosocutable.
Happy Birthday. May your liver respect you, fat bitches neglect you, hangovers reject you, and AA accept you.
So this is where people who peaked in high school come to drink?
I swear the toilet was so cold I tried to stand up but my balls wer frozen to it. most awkward five minutes between me and my mom.
dude ur drinkin a beer not ta capri sun. lose the straw
I woke up next to a box of cheese bread it was super romantic
I'd call the fact I ended up in my own bed a huge success
its times like this i wish i didnt have a penis
Tbh I’m not a vibrator enthusiast
But I am godly
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