happy early fathers day!!!
im not a father
about that...
Dude, I just saw a sixteen year old girl in a catholic school uniform buying a pregnancy test... With a coupon!
There isn't a single transaction on my online bank account that doesn't involve drugs or alcohol since November 12
other girls like to lick balls but none of them live for it like u do
just got a girls number while on a 5 am adderall cig break this is college at its finest
There is literally a guy in my class with a gallon of water and a trophy.
You should photoshop their heads on tigers first!!
For my parents' annivery card? How high are you?
I came home wearing somebody's thong. If you're missing one message me privately.
Sorry man, but I'd rather do drugs with strangers than watch sports with you. It's not personal, drugs always beat sports.
I sent him a tit pic on accident and he replied with "nice ass"
You introduced yourself and she said "wow that's a long name" and you went "yeah well you should see my dick."
I'm just going to ride dicks all the way to the to the gates of hell
Well, I'm most mad that he lied to you (about being married)...but the CAT THING IS A CLOSE SECOND
I just saw your mom take a body shot off an undergrad, please tell me you're somewhere near by.
If I slept with her my dick would come out glittery
coward.
Randomize