do you think it i'm gay because i was in a 3 way lastnight?
well not if you dont touch the other dude and concentrate on the chic
what chic?
Is licking assholes a new fad or something?
Have you not heard of Jennifer's supreme lust for William Shatner? She wants to eat Taco Bell off of his love handles
look, i may have sacrified a 20% assignment for a sprite. this is what hangovers do to me.
I just decorated my birth control case with Lisa Frank stickers. If that doesn't scream 'I'm not ready for babies' I don't know what does.
Slept on the counter again. Mom covered me in an apron.
The question is do I invite my fuck buddy to my graduation party now that my girfriend found out about her?
i told you that I felt like my feet were melting into the ground and you starting blowing on them to put out the "invisible fire". thanks friend.
You went around chanting "dinosaur period" and drinking tomato soup from the can.
I swear I can't go out anymore. It's like he put a GPS in my dick. I don't know if I should feel awkward or proud...
But how MUCH of an emergency? Like, should I go to the ER now, or can it wait until after the bar crawl?
STOP FUCKING TELLING PEOPLE ABOUT THAT TIME THAT GUY CAME ON MY FACE WHILE I WAS ASLEEP!!!
He caught me shoving meatballs into my mouth using my hand. Fuck utensils. It’s Christmas...and this is why I’m single.
They are good meatballs.
Now swiping left on 23-year-olds with abs. Is this adulting?
he told me I was hypnotizing him with my mouth so I guess I do give good head
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