is it really this hard to find a guy i can fuck and have a good time with who doesn't ask where things are going btwn us?
you sound like my dream girl
naighbors jacking off again. i swear its his friday night ritual, its like he knows the night wont be ending in his favor
Of course he wants me there for his birthday. If a girl offers you a blowjob for every year of your life, you're gonna want her to be there.
Im down. Even tho your nick name intimidates my vagina.
I've officially done it all, fucked a girl wearing a twister board. ABC parties are amazing!
I like you as a friend, but I'm in love with your dick.
I found his belly button lint in my hair. Can't say it was worth it.
If I don't have hickies that last till tuesday, I didn't do this weekend right
I can smell the sangria seeping out of my pores
Dude! We had to write our address on your arm in permanent marker so you wouldn't get lost. You just showed the cabbie your arm and he drove you! Nice guy.
We did it in the bar bathroom and the bathroom attendant sold us a condom. I love Nashville
when in doubt, mount your coworker in the staff room.
I have 35 pounds of pennies. Need any?
Should I apologize to him for saying I wanted to punch him in the face as I was digging through the trash?
I puked on someone's floor last night and then they proceeded to ask me on a date.
Randomize
