they just came back. i guess "were gonna go get dinner" means "were gonna fuck for 5 minutes at the little league field"
i justawanted to let you know that illi aalways be thwew for ui and o qill waasag youer dog whenebvet u wsnt
my mom found all the used condoms in my bed side table
whatd she say to you?
no words- put them all in a circle, put the bible in the middle
I don't understand why everytime I fuck his bestfriend he seems more interested in me...
Just found my old bop it. So many drinking game possibilities
No idea. I woke up in the middle of the night to you drooling and gnawing on my arm. Then you rolled over, punched the air 4 times, then proceeded to talk about your hair in your sleep.
Quick question, when did I develop feelings, and how can I make them go away?
That's two questions.
She kept saying how cute and adorable I was. I felt like a care bear getting a blowjob
Oh my god did you actually lose a tooth
you told me your favorite colors were "pink" "no pants" and "Mexican food"
That tampon felt like a stick in my vagina, I am never making a drunken tampon choice again. Friends don't let friends choose tampons drunk.
I'd cum everywhere if I could have chicken nuggets right now
Did you leave it the depths of Magic Mike's favorite banana hammock?
This hangover is what we deserve after that level of debauchery.
He was more upset that I got into his phone than about getting caught cheating.
Randomize