i left him drunk and in the fetal postion in the shower.
was the water running?
yeah but he said he knows how to swim
Get the fuck buddy a birthday present or not? He def deserves one, but how do I explain the debit card charge to my husband?
We talked about all of the sex positions that would better allow him to feed me grapes. I think I'm in love.
Mission get my tooth back and find a new dick to ride starts after i sleep for the first time in 2 days.
I'm a busy girl. All I wanted was noncommittal sex a few times a week
FridayRule: If it takes you longer than 5 minutes to find a parking spot, you don't have class today
We got to the hotel at 12AM with nothing but a plastic bag of magnum condoms and lube, while wearing glow sticks. The receptionist handed us a bunch of water bottles and said "These are on us.", not even phased by three dudes about to have a threesome. I love this town.
But I do cardio so I don't get winded during sex really it's not like I'm trying to lose weight
And your boyfriend doesn't mind you constantly taking pictures of his dick just to freak out your brother?
its more like he's accepted that he can't stop me
She's licking the whiskey out of the carpet. I think we may be soulmates.
A man can only lie in bed watching COPS for so long before he wants to do things that can lead him to starring on the show.
Seeking encouragement from my tinder matches to ace this test. I've sunk to a newest low.
Dude it's 6 am and you just invited me to a hotel with a shit ton of coke. Best morning ever
I cannot pick him out of a line up. I remember he is blonde and his half flaccid dick looks like gonzo. So unless he pulls down his pants I don't know who he is
I am afraid of asking him for his new number so I continue to text the one that's no longer in service.
Randomize
