the pool opens at 11. by 1115 the ambulance had been called.
I'm sitting here watching a kid lick a basketball- where have i gone wrong in life?
The walk of shame is far, far worse on crutches.
a fat lady just tried to bring a cooler stuffed full with burger kid through airport security. christ I'm going to miss the midwest.
The dean held back my hair as I was puking after graduation. That means so much more than a diploma and a handshake.
she tried giving me head in the pool. it was more entertaining than pleasurable
After we hooked up, he left the room and no one has seen him since last night. That kid redefined hit it and quit it.
I inspected his penis with a mini flashlight to check for visible stds...he was clean
They seemed upset when they walked out and saw a penis in a mouth
Wait, whatever happened to locking our vaginas in closets?
My penis is saying yes, several less important organs are saying noo...
Do you feel better now that you've sent me a picture of your dick?
Yep.
The cat ate a weed mint. This is not a drill
I woke up alone, naked in her bed staring at a lifesize poster of edward cullen,actually I'm lying I did have socks on
yeah, last night we handcuffed you and you started crying saying that you weren't a bad person
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