Somerville?? What the hell are you going to do there?
Watch a movie and have sloppy make outs OBVI. 45 Harris St. in case I die.
Something clean will definitely be barfed on tomorrow.
Today in psych we learned that you are a whore.
Me specifically?
Yep.
Have you ever seen a porn where they were playing bluegrass in the background?
I brought his matress to the living room we're laying on it listening to rick james drinking vodka
Hey do you want me to wrap up that Jack in the Box you left in my gutter
Can we talk about the fact that I plucked weed off your ass this morning like it's a normal thing to do?
The bald eagles cry cause u drink canadian beer.
It's cool, I power napped on the dryer while they were fucking in the bathroom so I'm good to go now. Where are you?
Had a dream that you were held at gun point. But I killed the guy. Then we embraced in the biggest hug while everyone around us clapped... Kinda how I imagine our wedding...
I almost died in that meeting. Nearly dried up and blew away in the pure powder form of boredom
I know that feel bro
Waiting on the notification from my fitness pal that tells me I'm an alcoholic
Things were going really well until his cousin showed up. She told him I look kind of like his mom, which started a ten-minute debate on my and his mother's specific features, and ultimately, who is prettier. Guess who my date picked.
I had mediocre parking lot sex last night so the night wasn't a complete bust.
not being a booty call is very strange. Who knew there was so much time for activities at night!
Randomize
