The guy next to me is watching porn. EVERYTIME I COME TO THE LIBRARY SOME RANDOM GUY NEXT TO ME LOOKS AT PORN.
so how does one go about finding a summer fling?
take advantage of an intern
When I got to his place, he served wine and cheese and made me sit on the balcony while he read his poetry to me. He cockblocked himself.
Since when does sleeping with your RA not result in free meal swipes? I feel so tricked...
I knew it was different as soon as you told me you slept with him and didn't tell me about his dick
He said he only likes girls with a sense of humor, after he took his pants off I understood why
I wore granny panties last night to ensure I didn't sleep with him. He said they made me seem more mature. I need a new plan
I do believe at one point I was dispensing medical advice while wearing your sombrero and a hulk hand
It's meant to be, Cynthia. You, him, and your developed breasts are meant for each other.
The bartender had to walk me home last night. New high or new low?
You put on a bike helmet, yelled "doesn't matter fuck it" then punched a stick the fire
She's walking to the bar while holding a fifth of fireball, talking on the phone and puking like its nothing out of the ordinary
Is it ok to bone a former patient who is also a client? Since it is two negatives does that cancel and become a positive?
You were like a drunk and unconscious tickle me elmo.
You’re welcome stay at my house. But, you gotta piss in the toilet
Randomize
