How'd it feel making her break her religion?
Its Shannon Doherty lazy not Forest Whittaker lazy
he actually used the line "do you have a map, because i'm lost in your eyes" and i was to drunk to care
Why is there a shirtless guy in Walgreens and why is he probably looking for the same thing I am?
Is it weird if I ask my drug dealer to prom? Be honest.
We Started drinking at 8am and left the bar around 11pm....I hate ALL green things
They let you pick the name that they announce for you at graduation. The professional world needs to prepare itself for papa smurf mcdonald.
I'm just trying to jam my tits into some coconuts and I'll be on my way
I'm sitting in my bathroom sink, eating a tuna sandwich. He had better weed than I expected.
bro, sorry for: trying to put you on fire yesterday, telling the bouncer that it was you that broke the bottles, and to have slept with your sister.
He motorboated me, gave me a business card that said congratulations on my motorboat, then disappeared into the night.
Find him and marry him.
A cute girl just told me she forgot to take her birth control and winked... I've never been so conflicted about fleeing in terror
Didn't pick classes because we were out all weekend...only open course is "alcohol and drug problems". Fucking ironic.
COCAINE IS GR8
She lured me back to her place with pizza and tits. I was totally helpless
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