Fucking love it maybe bedazzle some baby seals? Make them cuter? Who would club a bedazzled baby seal? Only a fucking monster.
Theyre still fighting about whether its called america or the united states.
Angelique from Rock of Love is now doing phone sex commercials for central illinois....id say she's going places.
cant help it. i get a boner every time that shake weight infomercial comes on
2 am we went back to his house. his mom handed us beers and cooked us pancakes. the next morning his dad had washed my car. i lied. living at home after college definitely does not suck.
No, he attached a coozie to his crutches so he can carry his beer around the party.
Ok, it is technically a gay bar but it's a total dive w/ strong drinks. The important thing is you can start drinking at 11:00 am without judgement
oh oh oh, and apparently you can bring in your own snacks. Some old dude just gave me cashews and cheetos.
I just recognized Courtney in a crowded Trader Joe's solely by seeing her ass. In other news, I survived the first round of layoffs today.
I'm not sure which feat is more impressive...
which guy lost his keys in my bed this weekend?
Her boobs take up a lot of room so God had to skimp on the brains
He slapped my ass and his clap-on light turned on.
I grabbed the pretzel bag with my toes last night. I think that day of yoga had paid off.
I think I met my butt stuff soulmate
Adderall went through the wash. Took it anyway. Wish me luck.
within five minutes of being here her dog found my vibrator in my bedroom and was carrying it around all proud! and her mom is here. so embarrassing :(
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