I went to moterboat her and I started laughing, so I just kinda blew on them... I think I'm gona call that move the sailboat.
at what point did you think saran wrap was a better alternative to shoes?
Lol. No. We cannot eat chicken while we have sex. No.
Ok, gonna go sleep cuz my brain wants to be smart and not follow my pussy into the danger zone
And I was aware of my actions - that is not a penis I will say no to until I have a ring on my finger
We are going to the humane society and getting you microchipped so you don't get lost on your birthday. Either that or your getting a child leash
What's the address and code again...does anyone need anything and why is my viking helmet on the bed?
I'm serious. I have boob tassles if this is an exchange thing.
I feel like I spent all day wearing underpants made entirely of poison ivy and sandpaper
Clearly I'm trying to change the world one fuck at a time
you DO IT for the people
Blacked in cold and wet, with them areound me singing Aaaaall we are saaaaayiiiing is YOU PEED YOUR PANTS
Butt Stuff 2016 unites us all
I think my liver has finally had enough and is going all Ashley-Judd-in-a-Lifetime-movie on me.
There's a weed, money and oreo filled pinata promised for our party.
Your mom asked you why you had bite marks all over your arms and you answered her by yelling "I HAD A SIESTA!"
Randomize
