I never noticed this but I have a beauty mark on my labia minora
Please tell me how you discovered this.
I was looking in the mirror snooping around
Like all of my pajamas are shirts of guys I shacked with in college
i'm starting to get pissed at how pandora is trying to force coldplay on me
I want to be a jewelry store heckler. "Hey man, is she really worth it"
Can I have the boy from 16 and pregnant's next baby???
there should be a national holiday dedicated to how high i am
This chick just checked into her walk of shame on Foursquare... I think I'm in love.
it was my 21st birthday. took an old mans walker so i could stay till last call. reasonable right?
I'm sitting in my bathroom sink, eating a tuna sandwich. He had better weed than I expected.
we were shitfaced at work by 8pm. I had to stop myself from pouring vodka in everyone's cappuccino.
Why is everyone in the bowling alley looking at me like i'm a prostitute just because I have bunny ears on?
I have reverted to folding laundry while watching porn. how much sadder can my life get?
I am gifting my birthday sex to you, but its okay because I can always just have birthday vibrator.
I tripped while walking across the stage and while trying to pick my diploma back up my flask fell out in front of the dean
Well while you were being a dick I was taping back together a cougars broken heart
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