Amandyke just told me shes gonna make my tongue her cum rag. i'm borderline terrified
it's not gay if you rub your penis between their butt cheeks and pretend they are tits
Her boobs more than make up for all the flaws with her personality.
He passed out on the floor and you kept hitting him in the dick and screaming "hammer of justice".
I'd be surprised if he had a problem with boundaries after helicoptering his penis in front of you
i dont care how hungover you are, go back to the frat house and get him. HE IS 11.
I just sent you a google doc listing all the reasons why I should stop hooking up with him. Feel free to add to it.
we spent fifteen minutes trying to convince you that you weren't locked inside of your car
He texted me saying that his mom found my nuva ring in their jacuzzi filter. I don't think I'm welcome back anytime soon.
I immediately knew he was tripping, he came over with a grocery bag of snow balls and a bike helmet on and asked if I was prepared to die for my country.
AND WHAT FELONIES DID I MISS OUT ON WHILE SLUMBERING!?
Dude of course I want to. Your penis is beautiful.
I got so drunk last night I took a ice bath with my mother in law
Life update: This fucking MacBook repair guy called me over last night for a booty call and he didn’t have a condom OR a bed
We had sex then laid in his bed eating chocolate and drinking juice boxes. I think I'm going to keep him around.
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