I just met lou reed's venus in furs. Her hands are slippery.
He just stood there...Helen Keller and I could have had a more interesting conversation
she told me that she was curious about how cum tasted. of course i left you.
SHE has hooked up with both me and my sister. I don't even know what to say. If she goes for my parents next I may have to kill her
his dick makes me think maybe a monogamous relationship forever is possible.
you kept yelling "this bitch stole my phone" to the guy who found you passed out in the parking lot
OH MY GOD MY GRANDMA JUST SHOWED ME HER BOOB OH. MY. GOD.
I left the guinea pigs on the dryer. Make sure to take care of them.
I went down on her on the dining room table. That should count for something.
I have his gate key so know he has to see me again.
Did we do drunk science last night? There's tequila in the test tubes...
OK... But I need to shower first because I'm covered in stuff I definitely shouldn't have slept in
God specifically crafted these hands to deal out orgasms.
He's watching Always Sunny and eating refried beans straight from the can.
when I walked in the door they were passed out naked, on top of eachother, with tetris controllers in their hands.
Randomize