yeah she is the one who tells people i beat girls.. which ironically make me want to punch her in the face
There is something just so refreshing and wonderful about an uninterrupted morning poop in the office.
You are an asshole
haha sleeping beauty awakes.
Where did you find this costume?
M WATCHING THE HISTORY CHANNEL AND IT SAID THAT WHEN THE LUST PART OF THE BRAIN IS ACTIVATED THE JUDGEMENT PART IS NOT. THIS EXPLAINS SO MUCH.
just found a carrot inside of a baby sock. living with toddlers is like living with tiny hammered people.
It smelled like mall pretzels. Of course I investigated.
Somehow "stranger danger" turned into making out with a 25 year old on burbon street.
I'm still finding big obvious chunks of condom around my car.
Dude it started out with let's find some food and ended up with me getting a needle in the face
And then we made hashbrowns with vodka and queso.
Holy. Fuck. This mans mouth is magical. I love married men. I don't have to teach them.
I will give you the couch, a small portion of the fridge, and plenty of beer.
Got my future figured out. I'm oddly comforted. Thanks, bro.
Ok fine, yes she's pregnant. But you're ignoring the most important part. HER BOOBS GOT BIGGER. That doesn't happen every day, and I owe it to myself to enjoy those boobs before the belly catches up to them!
Do you remember when I didn't post that pic of you fucking an avocado on your boss' desk? Can you return the favour?
I did crash a prom last night though.. It was fun
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