I think tequila should come with a little jiminy cricket
i just walked with a girl who was carrying a chair down the street. apparently she got mad at the bartender and took the bar stool when she left.
I thought spray tan was a myth
?
You know, something that only happens in Jersey
if you don't let us come over today i'm not taking the second plan b pill. your call.
she broke up with me using backstreet boy lyrics
you deserved it if you knew it was backstreet boys.
All I remember is running out of the bathroom with one shoe on and the other in my hand. Pretty sure I was yelling as well.
You rode him down the last flight of stairs like a human sled.
On that note I give you a 10 for sticking the landing and staying on the whole ride.
It got messy; I did a shot of seamonkeys.
I figure a girl that drinks as much as I do should always have pregnancy tests on hand
Drunk me made out with someone's girlfriend last night, was invited to their place for a semi-threesome, and then walked home at three am. Can't decide if this is better or worse than drunkenly challenging everyone to taekwondo sparring matches...
i wore a power symbol belly button ring just so i can drunkenly tell him that he turns me on. i dont care if it works i think its classy
The sex is great, I just think it'd be better if we listened to Deftones during it.
NOT ALL OF US HAVE THE HANDS OF GODDAMN ANGELS YOU KNOW
You still owe me one bodily function mess clean up.
You pee on the floor one time and you never hear the end of it...
I fell out of my bed whilst trying not to move this morning. I AM ADULT
I had ice cream for breakfast two days in a row.
SUPER ADULTS
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