she looked like she should be chained to micheal vicks radiator
3 different guys in my psych class know me as 3 different names and said hi to me with all 3 different names-Andrea, Grace, and Bella
I've never been more proud of you
No I remember falling down the stairs I just don't remember it hurting.
So my prents justed posted "DO NOT DISTURB" on facebook and i just heard their door shut and lock...I'm leaving
Oh god. There is a bite mark in the bar of soap. Please tell me I was not that wasted.
This is the way my sobriety ends: Not with a bang, but with a whimper.
I'm over this relationship. I'm just going to get drunk all day, wake up in a puddle of my own vomit again, and go on with my life
We enjoyed our moment of partial gayness together
No, trust me. Falling down the stairs is a fucking sobering experience.
I have 39 hot sauces from Chipotle
It's like earning obesity badges
Are you wearing clothes?
Fuck no, who do you think I am
That moment when you can't decide if you should vote for the random frat guy you have head to at the beginning of the semester for business and technology senator.
false alarm, still single
Shes the whorey leader of that wolf pack, and all the less whorey wolves report back to her. She teaches them the ways
I cam home to find him twitching on the floor, surrounded by unopened condoms and covered in cranberry sauce (yes I tasted it) while Thundercats was playing.
Randomize
