hot mess party of 2 ur bar is now available
Dude, she had a vegina. I felt like Indiana Jones cutting a path through the jungle.
take it from a girl who woke up with a girl in her bed... you were not that drunk.
the coke olympics were a bad idea. there's a tree uprooted in the front of my building.
I seriously just found a rose petal in my vagina.
How the hell did he get a boner in that type of situation?
She pushed me over. She offered me a shot from her tits. We're good now
Who knows. I'd probably only get a makeout with an OTPHJ from her so the return on sexual investment from her isn't looking that great.
i'll fuck you during the next apocalypse. promise
It could happen. I haven't creeped the rest of the guest list yet.
Just creeped. Everyone is a passable 7. Orgy is a go!
That Kevin guy is something else...His penis is fucking glorious. And he has a way with words. If he lived here I'd be the conductor of the fuck caboose. I mean literally I would never want to get off that thing.
Ran into my statistics professor at the bar, he chugged a car bomb and yelled "x bar mothfucker!". On average I'm loving this PhD program.
why do guys have to express their feelings when they know your seeing someone else ? I fucked him anyways to make him feel better , and to know what he's missing.
She wouldn't fuck me because I had a cast, so I took her friend home
I miss you and I miss your weed. Come home.
Randomize
