He wanted to take me out and said we could "go huntin in the woods."
It smells like Drakkar Noir and desperation out here.
That's why you should quit smoking.
Remember when we were mad at her for brining her mom on spring break? She just won the wet t-shirt contest. I think we owe her an apology.
In the middle of blowin me she stoppped and told me how easy it would be to insert a catheter ..... Apparently she was a nursing major
Only if you bring Listerine. I can't come home to my husband from a bachelorette party with spermbreath again.
you came here, splled a bunch of margaritas, hung up a picture of yourself and then left
How many layers of skin can you loose before it becomes bad?
just peed in rthe mens room but seranaeded them with adelle the whole timee so they didnt mind
This girl came outta nowhere yelling HOLD MY DICKKKKKK!
I got a lap dance from a guy last night dressed as a school girl. Heels and all. His heels got stuck in my fish nets
Impressive. I've never gotten straight denied and then chased the guy naked out of my own apt. I'll remember that next time.
Thanks for duct tapping my dick to my leg while I was passed out. I could only aim straight down. I stood on your bed. Have a nice day at work!
If I could eat my chicken parm naked, it would be the closest I could ever be to God.
I told him. He hasn't said anything. Crying and holding cats is probably what is happening.
Just once, can I please come back to a room that doesn't smell like beer and cum?
Randomize
