I heard we made out
You hurt me so bad and it feels so good
You're perfectly engineered for doggy style
my clit piercing makes the metal detector go off
i do not condone bathtub ky wrestling
official worst smell ever. a used condom that has gone through the dryer.
I just paid a homeless man $20 for the dragon ball Z shirt he was wearing. I need to stop drinking
his grandma walked in on us. twice. and he was truly fucking surprised when i put my pants back on.
I attempted to stand up and was quickly reminded by gravity that I am the universe's bitch right now
Which I'm also surprisingly fine with. If he walked into the bedroom naked, holding a fish in one hand and a lit candle in the other and said "Let's get fucking weird." I'd probably go with it. He's just that hot.
Whats your number? 5 or more?
Cinco. It sounds smaller in Spanish.
FIND ME A DICK TO RIDE THAT HOPEFULLY IS ATTACHED TO A CUTE PERSON AND NICE PERSONALITY
CHALLENGE ACCEPTED. Is it okay if I only get 2 out of 3?
The D is nonnegotable.
I love you. I would never turn you into a bear.
I just threw up in front of a bunch of parents/prospective students while they were on a campus tour..awesome..
It was all like "my feathers evolved from scales of a reptile bitches!!" and I was all like "damn this chocolate milk is AWW SOOME!"
Randomize
