Job is the problem. Drinking, the solution.
I mean I had a leg brace. It would have been irresponsible for me to be on top.
And by go well you mean everyone's hammered right?
Yupp. And someone's bleeding
Based on your 5AM twitter activity I gather you found MORE FREE COKE??
that is terrible, if I can't drink Gatorade when I'm hungover I don't wanna live in this world. that's like denying wild rams to run free in the wild and frolic
This guy dressed as a piece of paper for Halloween, I felt it was only necessary to sign his penis
I really should have gone with the man who kept offering me cocaine. Why did I chose the German!? STUPID!
Come over. Bring cocaine. And my t shirt with the dolphin on it.
Like the fear of satan was put into my heart when I saw him put that sandwich on the WOODEN BENCH
The amount of dicks I have seen in the last hour is more than I have seen in my whole life.
listen i get youre a daddy dom but that doesnt give you a pass to make dad jokes
I was at a hookups house and peed in his sink so I wouldn't wake up his mom... drunk me is on a different level
I knew I no longer wanted to bone him when he put the Grease soundtrack on as "mood music", no guy looks attractive singing and dancing to greased lightning naked.
Well that didn’t go as expected.
I mean, it ended in you giving each of them a blowjob, so it kinda did.
I used to shoot steroids in my ass but for a totally different reason
Randomize
