How do I get over judging people who I would be exactly like if I had a boyfriend
Get a boyfriend
the number of months ive had a girlfriend in my life divided by the number of blowjobs ive gotten is extremely depressing...
I found a dealer that takes plastic. I'm so in trouble.
Just found the book "How to Stay Christian in College" on my roommates desk. At a loss for words...
i didn't know falling asleep in the tbell line could get you a dui. Isn't everyone there stoned or drunk?
I vomitted in the hotel where they film gossip girl last night. Everywhere.
We should have cut you off when you asked the can driver if you could ride in the trunk.
I'm naked in the window of the hotel and I feel like I'm walking in slow motion like a robot
You guys bombarded us in the bathroom and that kid whipped his dick out and peed in the sink.
Once again being low on toilet paper is forcing us into another round of our favorite game - toilet paper roulette - where there can only be 1 winner. Maybe.
He doesn't want a full on relationship, he provides me with all the weed I can handle and gives me multiple mind blowing orgasms. He's my soul mate.
The problem I'm having with looking for jobs while drunk is reading is really hard
If you're wondering about the mess, we had sex in the kitchen. There was noodles involved.
You're at a grade school volley ball game with a yeti of tequila. You've passed extra
It's scary that my vibrator is a dangerous weapon. I want a new one.
Randomize
