Our friend ended up naked, bleeding, requesting we throw a couch at him cause he was convinced he could block it
We did he did.
When I say naked, I mean penis exposed. Not in boxers
Fuck, operation next sex victim is on as soon as i get back. Do not sleep with that red head, nobody likes accidental ginger babies.
Playing drinking games to Nancy Grace totally counts as "keeping up with current events.."
I am dripping wet and slathered in glitter and banana mush. I love gay guys.
Just walk straight and zig zag through cars tell you get to the road. That's where I am. Perpendicular to the doors do not make any turns
Also, what is a socially acceptable way to introduce a crossbow in public?
Where was Alyssa when you were sniffing the bouncer?
Passed out on some guy who looked like someone from Duck Dynasty.
That's one good thing about being an only child. I can masturbate wherever the fuck I want
They are like untrained puppies reaking havoc on a newly furnished house. Out of control.
You just compared our vaginas to a newly furnished house...I can dig it.
One day he'll find out I do drugs and stop talking to me.
What will you do then?
Drugs, probably.
He showed up to my apt at 6am wearing a suit and holding a bag of coke....how could I not let him in?
so horny i almost want to text him..and then i remember the restraining order i have against him
I'm waiting for you in a manthong right now.
It's like a donut of clothes around a pair of heels. Like they were transported to another dimension naked.
send nudes
from the living room?
Randomize
