They're having chugging contests. With juice. Please get me out of Utah.
I'm currently trying to figure out how I woke up naked and handcuffed to my bed. Not real worried about class right now.
seeing an 80 year old woman puke in the bushes changes everything...
that's spring break in florida for ya
Found my little brother jerking off with a condom. he said he was "practicing"
OMG its one we used last night
Chasing bourbon with pepto... Dedication.
I'm writing my will in case I die this week, it'll be saved on my computer under: little 500 death scenario
How do the freshmen here NOT understand the tricks we are playing on them by now? Doesn't bode well for grad numbers. Idiots.
You will not judge me for my made-up holiday of wine appreciation day
Maybe. This hangover is made of nightmares and that thing from the Alien movies.
I am the slutty bisexual glue that holds this friendship group together.
feelin groggy baby? need a coffee? vitamins? a nice good fuck on the piano?
So you're on like a list there now..."Do not under any circumstances give this person a knife. Serve them in plastic cups ONLY"
I was using my Beauty and the Beast blanket as a makeshift skirt because no pants
I'm eating Doritos at 9am because last nights weed is just now starting to wear off
He fucked me so hard my nail polish actually chipped. I'm keeping him.
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