it was nice. we just kind of hung out. she didnt even mention the farting incident.
she gave me a disgusted look and asked how i could live with myself. because i havent seen the rocky horror picture show. and then dumped me.
we're stoned watching those roller coaster simulators w our hands up screaming on our couch
You know how hard it is to jerk off in a bathtub with a dog staring at you?
the saddest part is, this is not even the first time i've woken up in a shopping cart with a concussion.
That chick went from zero to shitshow in only 6 shots.
I just fucked her in her boyfriends bathroom... he was in the room sleeping.
hurry up this bar wont let me order big pitchers of beer for just myself
Watching him is like watching a star slowly implode
I still have a little drunk in my system
I have never lost more friends than while playing Uno drunk.
so my dads pretending to use the snow blower and theres absolutley no snow one the ground.... someone should really lock our liqour cabinet
I was simply suggesting that you really should try coke bondage sex.
So in hindsight, going through the McDonald's drive thru plastered at 4 a.m. on stolen bikes was a bad idea.
She's writing hockey erotica again.
Tell her to pick another team besides ours this time.
Randomize
