the mole on his forehead could get me off better than his dick
please tell me you have proof of this
PS Can you transmit a UTI to a sexual partner? I tried to ask, but the doctor just told me to abstain (sup Bristol) for my own good w/o answering
I guess the cop knew i was on a walk of shame and felt bad...i got to play with the siren the rest of the way home
On the couch having a debate with the dog over whether eating anothr sweet roll will make the hangover better or worse
I wore a leash I'll tell you about it later I had a fantastic time
Just found a peacock feather in my car. Should I be the least bit concerned about this?
I can't find the keys to get out of my front door, there are random socks in my bicycle basket and I can see a plastic handle of cheap vodka sitting on my porch. oh, and my head just broke u with me.
He's a forty-something balding gay man with no boundaries or sense of social norms. Of course we should befriend him.
Grandma can hear your bong from the living room, please be more quiet. Love mom.
Doing the walk of shame and bringing my dad a newspaper en route. Favourite daughter status confirmed.
Alive.
So much puke
I bet he'd be real motivational during sex. And he'd probably make you call him superman.
You KNOW it was a good night when you find French fries AND taco remnants in your bra when you get home...
You kicked my dad IN THE NUTS right when he walked in.
Sorry, man. Thought he was a cop.
Why is my belly button ring in my ear
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