OMFG I JUST SAW SOMEONE GIVING SOMEONE ELSE ROAD HEAD AND THEY HIT A POTHOLE. my day has been officially made.
So his roomate was eating breakfast when I was sneaking out. He's the guy I took home from jessicas wedding. I ended up eating coco puffs with him
Just another sign I need to get out of this town
Another weekend, another 3 guys I have to awkwardly avoid while crossing campus...
All we had was a keg so we played edward nalgene-hands
no today was horrible, i woke up and somebody slit my car tire and left an apology letter in my wiper that said "sorry wrong house"
I got kicked out of an open bar wedding reception. The bride "felt threatened" by my presence. Not my fault she's ugly
My warmest regards to the fish in that koi pond I puked in.
They just came out of my bathroom and asked if I could spare them a condom. See. Its a good thing I have some.
update: ifinallt managed t5o be in a. Horizontal position without throwing up... the snmall victories.
she let a homeless guy feel her up so she could go for a ride in his shopping cart
Safe to say I relapsed into my old chatroulette drunk flashing days.
The night went downhill when he lit her purse on fire and tried putting it out with vodka
How do we stop her downward spiral?
Wine. For us.
He told me he was cooking me a special dinner tonight. His "five star meal" was popcorn in champagne glasses, and chic fil a sauce in jello shot containers to dip the popcorn in. He still tries to convince me he doesn't smoke weed anymore.
Drunk sex on a hardwood floor is never ever a good idea. Lesson learned.
Randomize
