Getting food. Want anything?
Vagina. Double meat no buns. I have the secret sauce
I hate u. Im listening to lady gaga and all i can hear is boca base om om om ommmm
I love the progression of these pictures. I go from cute to Courtney Love
You tried to call the hospital and left a voicemail asking if you could be put on the liver transplant list as a "pre-caution"
And surprisingly enough iPhone does not have an app for Russian mail order brides.
i wish i coudl send you meat via computure
She's cheated on every boyfriend she's ever had with the same guy. She's like a slutty yo-yo.
Gooodnight my beautiful sex angel. Much luvz for joo, etceteraz
Guys with values who care about your personality don't cum on your back the 2nd time they you sleep with you.
That awkward moment when the dude you blew on camera in college friend requests you on Facebook.
Who is this?!????
That awkward moment when you think you're texting a friend the above statement, but instead you text a stranger.
IT ISN'T. I'M A LITTLE HIGH.
YOU'RE ALWAYS A LITTLE HIGH.
NO. IT'S RARE THAT I'M A LITTLE HIGH. I'M ALWAYS HIGH AS FUCK. THERE'S A DIFFERENCE.
did you just say you're too stoned to fool around? okay we're over.
Handcuffs. Recoverd. I'm a goddamn detective.
Just got home, my brothers stoned and he got a high score on COD.. He just asked me if I wanted to have a celebrational yogurt with him. Wtf?
They weren't kidding when they said "Go Army Strong." Best sex I ever had.
Randomize