great, thanks for announcing that I gave you head over twitter
at least I said it was good
i gave her road head last night, needless to say it wasn't the same and i bit a chunk of the inside of my cheek off.
still haven't packed clothes. only wine. gotta love spring break
the only thing he could say in english were 'insert coin here' and 'game over'. i love spanish men.
i remember getting really pissed off when you wouldn't let me sleep in the garage with your cat.
Currently sitting in the movie theatre bathroom while she gives him a blowjob in the parking lot. Don't ever tell me I'm a bad friend.
There is nothing quite so awkward as watching topless bullriding with your mother next to you..
What is soo wrong about a house of half-naked people hugging each other and laughing?
The pinata full of drugs?
Locals got pissed I was talking to the barmaid. Tried to tell me that they keep all the good beer at "a Soho walkup" Google saved me
We spent 45 minutes searching the crevices of our friend's car with a pair of tweezers trying to find the acid that we dropped
a guy messaged me on POF to ask if I knew of any places that were hiring. And was being completely deadass serious. I'm so done
I just wanna inform you guys that the first pregnancy scare of 2016 is over...
she's pretty fucking smug for someone who has had unprotected sex with a convicted felon
One lone grasshopper in the whataburger bathroom. Don't know how it got there. Scared the fuck out of me. Also puked over the side of the silverado fence. The horses looked disappointed. Animal magnetism is beautiful. You taught me well. I love you.
it was like where's waldo, only the stakes were much higher.
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