I told u I don't really remember everything lol i pretty much remember not lasting as long as I norm and that I wore a condom, I hate condoms
well most of my day revolves around power hour
heey were did you guys go? last time i remember seeing you i was throwing up in the fountain
Whatever. We're stealing a penguin. Your not allowed near him... You did this to yourself.
Sunshine is the equivalent of sprinkling whore pellets on campus.
The drunk fake out is her specialty. She'll agree to come with us and two seconds later we check to make sure she's still there and we see her booking it down the hall in the opposite direction.
She wants to go furniture shopping for memorial day so we've gotta go portable
thermos full of jaeger bombs?
Affirmative
I think the universe has a conglomeration of sentences reserved only for me.
grandma made pot brownies .. oh god bless us everyone
I tried to order champagne at IHOP last night
Just threw up in the shower. Hangovers at 23 are the best.
I just need some of your time and all of your body.
Guy just walked in with a 40 and a Honda steering wheel. Where the fuck am I?
Sorry if that was awkward, i will never call you sober ever again
We’re leaving where are you
Hold on Toxic just started playing
Randomize
