The girl in the car behind me just took a bowl hit. I miss college.
Climbing onto the roof in a dress and high heeled boots was probably not the best idea, especially after all that Bacardi.
there was naked duck duck goose
how does that even get suggested?!
after naked leap frog.... it wasn't that big of a deal
No, I think it was the night I threw up in her front yard. You're thinking of the time I threw up in her backyard.
I don't remember her missing an ear while we were at the bar
I shouldn't have to thank you for taking off your captain hat off before we had sex
you want a dog just so you can strap a barrel of hot chocolate around its neck?
YOU WERE HAVING SEX IN THE SAME BED I WAS SLEEPING IN. AND YOU GRABBED MY HAIR. OF COURSE I'M PISSED.
But he's not just anonymous male genitalia anymore. I've met him, I've seen his face.
I think Saturday night will always be a mystery to me, except for buying an excessive amount of birthday shots for everyone and yelling BIRTHDAY SHOTS before every shot.
Sure. But we have to be quiet.
Ninja mode activated
Why does 2015 have to start with so many regrets?
Hey, it's all about finding the bright side. And boobs are definitely a bright side.
Is it rude to send him a, "happy birthday, I hope you finally get an STD" text?
i woke up this morning from the best one night stand. i made the guy mickey mouse pancakes for breakfast and when i walked back into the bedroom he said "marry me"
Randomize
