her nipple to breast ratio was just odd
I really need to get laid. I'm telling at least 10 girls that I love them tonight.
Odds are at least 1 out of those 10 girls will be as crazy as you and will be into it.
can you go into shock from having too many orgasms? i think i went into shock.
i honestly don't know why someone didn't cut me off after i broke the ceiling lamp with MY HEAD
It's "your husband had his mouth on my vagina" awkward.
I may hire someone just to sell my family the drugs they keep asking me for. It's cutting into my doing drugs time.
She told me that for every Ravens touchdown, I'd get to come once.
Marry her. Marry her now. I'll help you steal the ring.
So he drunk messaged me last night telling me he wants a baby. Think I should call his bluff?
I think there is a legit party going on the place we thought was AA
I think one of my ovaries is committing suicide. But that is a topic for another day.
Friday is the holy day of drinking. Thou shalt observe the Sabbath. It's in the bible. Look it up bitch.
I'm ready to run through the streets naked yelling "HES ALIVE!"
We banged in my car doggy style with my head out the window. The sky was marvelous and I saw a shooting star. Its destiny; we're meant to fuck forever.
By talk things out did he mean have passionate angry sex?
I just woke and had to fish my phone out of a bowl of chili. I was wrist deep in it. WHO BROUGHT CHILI TO A PARTY?!
its not chili. and you brought it.
Randomize
