Yup u can hook up with me now and not goto jail
my hot student got the clitoris wrong on the lab practical...so it kinda makes me not want to pursue it
just because he can't find it on a cat, doesn't mean he can't find it on you
My boyfriend woke me up in the middle of the night to have sex with me right before I had sex with another guy in my dream. What a unique sixth sense his penis has.
I know you're trying to keep the moaning to a minimum but the banging on the wall is totally giving you away
Mmmhmmm sure, nice try, but there's certain wounds that only bj's can heal
the last thing i remember saying is "hope you like body hair"
in my lab write-up should i mention that i watered my plant with tequila?
It's one of the many facets of my drunken alter egos. I'm like substance abuse batman.
He stopped replying so I told him I got tested and it came back positive for chlamydia to see if he replied. His phone magically works again!
you passed out while setting up your phones timer to time how long it would take before you to passed out.
It's def pee. WHY DO I PEE ON THINGS WHEN I DRINK TEQUILA
Can you bring me the toilet please
They were so sore! Either I have bed bugs or you were biting my nipples last night and don't lie to me.
It's the never-ending clusterfuck that is my love life
dude the last time we saw him was 2 nights ago when he was yelling that the trees were naked or some shit then he ran into the forest. I think its time for a search party
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