What's the name of that girl you hooked up with? The one that looks like the fire hose sign.
So this girl in my math class just went to the bathroom, tampon in hand, comes back with it still in her hand starts digging around in her purse, takes her thing of birthcontrol out, goes oh fuck, and downs the rest of the pills. Got to love college.
alright got my week's quota of sex in, ready for modern warfare 2
we're doing beer bongs from the windmill...epic
I love memorial day. It's drinking in the name of patriotism. God Bless America
I think he'd cut a tree down for me. He's from North Dakota. That's something hot guys do there, right?
Just bartered a McD's cheeseburger and fries for two pitchers. Oregon Trail ain't got shit on me.
Would it be a good deed to leave a 32 pack of bud light next to a bum sleeping in the park?
I'm at the local community college pretending to be a substitute for a computer applications class
Dude hobos go hard. I learned a lot last night.
How do you say happy birthday to someone you fuck occasionally that almost got you arrested? Like what do I text.
Ended up in some house where this dude has a $1200 leopard cat
I am praying to every god I can that he drank so much that he won't even remember me
Also, two points for knowing me well enough to know I definitely would put the moves on his brother.
I WANT GRASS AND TREES NOT SOMEONE SWINGING A SWORD AROUND
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