So the hot 23 year old i went home with last night is really 17 and was here for orientation.. i feel like a pedifile...
In that case, you should probably come up to the union, orientation is in full swing, your kind of guys ;)
cunt.
Dude that chick had her name tattooed in Japanese characters between her b-cups. I kept calling her Toyota.
i wanted a birthday blowjob. not a birthday VD.
How do I introduce myself to her without coming off as "the guy who jacks-off to her profile pic"?
does pizza still have the 5 second rule in the bubble bath?
Hungover snowboarding. Puked off the lift and traumatized a group lesson for kids. Crash course on adulthood.
Puked in the hotel lobby and just kept walking. I love mardi GRAS.
I dont think ive ever had a drunk day betray me so hard before
We are gunna have the best winter break smoking weed and eating ham
Had a guy spin me around at the bar, kiss me then say "oh shit you're not who I thought you were" and then walk away.
SOMETIMES YOU HAVE TO BLAST VANESSA CARLTON IN YOUR CAR AT MIDNIGHT TO FEEL AGAIN. IDK.
I can count on one hand the number of good things that happened over the past year.
There's something empowering about being at dinner and sitting across the table from two men you've blown.
The best part of being a lesbian? If I'm late for work at a hookup's place I can use her make up and peace out. Well and all the sex of course.
Turns out dignity is priceless and Plan B costs $41.09
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