We stole some shitttt from king sooper's. fuck yeaaa
what did you steal
frozen pizza, cat litter, and preperation H. not much different than my usual grocery list.
idea:have a jello shot stand(opposed to lemonade stand) to raise money for spring break
I wish the inside of the tampon box said "CONGRATULATIONS YOUR NOT A MOTHER!"
You would think that someone would have been sober enough to object to vodka bong races.
I blew him and did charles barkley impressions at the same time. what a pro
Dude. That is just waaaay to much random to process after that tequila battle.
we are blowing up condoms and making balloons and we’re drunk on the floor. You could have come to school here
I hope you realize that its not me making that decision, but rather the combination of my genitals and sexual orientation
did you just take a shot to penises and friendship?
Honestly I have a huge freedom boner right now and if I came it would be red white and blue
It's only just- an eye for an eye, a tooth for a tooth, a nude for a nude
That reminds me of the morning I woke up on the sidewalk covered in chicken wings
Smargarita sloshedurday tomorrow around 2
Bring a helmet for your liver
I should never have to text my best friend asking if she eloped again last night.
You know when you're a kid and you play at the pool until you passed out? It was like that except instead of playing it was sex.
Randomize
