The two bassists just totally made out. I NEED MENNA'S RIGHT now.
8:17pm: So, How was fun day?
1:15am: So I just woke up in my bed in my bathing suit... I don't remember getting into bed or dinner or anything after slip n slide that happened around five... I'd say fun day was a success
I woke up to a text that said "You're a fucking asshole" Why is she so pissed at me?
Im guessing it has something to do with running up to her boyfriend screaming "THIS IS SPARTA" and kicking him in the balls.
Is that considered a cock block?
I checked into jail on foursquare
I mass texted 4 of you for a booty call. Please reply all when responding so only one of you shows up. Last one is a rotten egg.
Mid way while flirting with this super hot chick at the bar, he gets up and says no thanks I'm only 19 and gay just waiting for my buddy to hurry up and get with your friend.
My ex was there, the 2 girls I'm seeing showed up and I had a pocket full of VIP passes 2 the strip club. Had all the makings of an epic night but I fell asleep at the bar.
Oh yea... In other news I've decided to get an external hard drive and start getting music from all the guys I'm fucking... Do you think a terabyte would be enough storage space?
So I'm thinking that so long as I have this piercing, I'm going to get tested for explosives at the airport
you know you've had too much sex when your vagina hurts when you laugh
I told my manager I was trying to conserve my energy for date night/Sexual Olympics later. That's legit for another break, right?
How many nights in 2015 can we have no one get injured, run away crying, or get into a brawl?
I think him and kristen are pretty serious now.. I dont think he cheats on her, anymore.
we f'd six times
f'd?
its sunday, i cant say fucked
just got back. in my inebriated state i broke an ugly lamp and was sent to the store (still drunk) to get a new one. just spent last half hour in isle 3 of dollar general surounded by more ugly lamps and trying not to throw up on each and every single one.
Randomize
