I have eleven tally marks and an infinity sign drawn on my wrist in permanent marker. Senior bar crawl stole my liver.
I just found her phone in the quesadilla maker...
you're acting like its my fault you're allergic to sperm or something.
i told you we never speak of that again
Just got a hand job during Charlie St.cloud I honestly never thought Id thank Zac Efron fir one of his movies but thank you
I cant prove it..but im almost positive that you were just outside my window watching me while eating out of a bag of Cheetos...
There is a contact in my phone named "Bar Mcntysu." this is why we need a third person to go out with us.
But he found my shoe...that at least deserves a handjob.
Pretty sure the girl next to me in Chipotle just came out to her mom.
We shared a dick. We're practically sisters!
He's very cute and has a totally sit-able face.
He paid for a 5 star hotel suite and I raided the mini bar after he left. I think that’s bad karma. Want some pringles?
I’m pretty sure I have teeth marks on my neck
I just read my D.A.R.E. essay from 5th grade. I'm having mixed feelings about my previous life choices right now.
I really need to stop having sex.. I haven't been able to get a brush through the back of my hair for a good week and a half
Alone, in the dark, eating tacos and drinking vodka. Who's apartment is this?
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