Having an 'SDSU Mom' sticker is just like say 'Hi, my daughter has an std"
you're dressed like that and you're on the rag, that's false advertisment
Pants on the Ground is the theme song of my life
Nothing quite says America like barbecue and beer at 9 in the morning.
No I'm not coming over. That Bob Ross drinking game is too intense.
Lets just fuck. We'll decide if it was makeup or breakup sex after.
Were playing beruit winners pelt losers with eggs
There are fucking limits. Jerking another guy off in the bar toes the line.
Well it's 2pm. Time for another game of "Who, What, Where". The game where you try to guess who this girl is, what happened last night, and where'd your shit go. I'm going for 1/3 today.
That's better than I've done so far.
Being at this stripclub only reinforces how single I am. And I was *just* becoming okay with that.
stef broke her leg trying to vault over the coffee table. these olympics drinking games are going to fucking kill us
well... I just junk punched a carnie. Doesnt matter how, it still counts for my bucket list.
If I could I'd magically teleport drugs and alcohol to you. Like a bad decision fairy.
A bitchslap is in order.
I am witnessing a blind guy whip ass at beer pong
Randomize