everyone made a circle around them and startd chanting fight fight. they wernt fighting, they were dry humping
you won't ask to borrow his earbuds because you think it's gross, but you'll have sex with him?
I legitimately sent him a storybook of naked pictures.
You fell asleep with your fingers in my vagina. You made this a relationship.
how the fuck is Katelyn 5'1" and 85 lbs and she tackled a bouncer to the ground?
How many beers are too many "cause it's Archer Thursday" beers?
The only thing that was weird was that it WASN'T weird when she got out of the shower and saw me blowing him.
Can we just ponder our lives for a second.
No I think my brain may implode in a puff of cocaine and sparkles.
Please. I don't care how shitty his fake life story was. As horny as I was I just wanted the prettiest man possible in case I accidentally got pregnant. He had blue eyes.
No, I know her type. Tall, lanky, uses teeth when giving head, and runs like a giraffe. Don't do it man..
"Just cut me in half. Then take half of me home. And leave the other half here. Cuz I can't see."
Dont even get me started. you fell asleep in my kitchen after being cockblocked when you tried to use my roommates bedroom.
tried to suck my ex boyfriends dick last night at a bar... Happy homecoming from me to you
LIKE ALL I WANT TO CURE MY HANGOVER IS PORKROLL AND LIKE 85% OF THIS COUNTRY DOESN'T KNOW WHAT IT IS
He’s perfect! He listens to Genesis during sex and has a VW bus!
You really are from the panhandle, aren’t you?
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