Plan A DEFINITELY worked... Go with me to get Plan B??
hanging on that rope, lady gaga looks exactly like a used tampon
all i know is that if they can hide that much blood in her outfit, they definitely could have hid a penis
she was on her period so I asked if she wanted to make ass babies
everybody makes mistakes
i didn't know they allowed you to text in ambulances
It just hurt to pee because he was fingering for fucking gold in there.
Let's just say my vagina is not superimpressed with the superintendent of schools.
The assistant vp has a bottle of wine on his desk & I have a feeling my boobs will be making an appearance today.
Well anything after a French guy would have been a disappointment. But I'm fairly certain he was just trying to masturbate into me.
I don't know if this whole sobriety thing is going to work out... It's only been 3 days and I want to chug vodka
just saw sorostitutes streaking near the university president's house. thank you tequila day
This guy is walking around with a deer head on. Honestly what the fuck
My vagina feels like it's been kissed by angels.
I gave the bike taxi guy a blowjob because I didn't have any cash. College.
I have a video on my phone of someone streaking in my house last night, do you have any idea who it is?
Apparently when you start crushing adderall and blending them into your margaritas calling them blenderalls you have "a problem" WTF
Randomize