Incredible sex, Maddow, more sex, spoon, sex again
Hes far too high and trying to explain daylight savings time to me. Help?
By the way, her vagina was so tight i was worried that i would be stuck forever
He said he had to make up a lie of why he couldnt sleep with her. It must really suck to have a sunburned dick.
The Firefighter Games are going to be in Tampa the same weekend I am. I think God is answering my vagina's prayers.
Why is it only times like these when I'm scrubbing the cum stains off my futon before my family gets here that I seriously begin to question my life choices?
She gave me head while using a laptop on my stomach to go online. I've never seen a better feat of multitasking.
Well I will be attending the wedding with a flask of wine, potentially with a straw, and POM POMS for cheering purposes. Needless to say I will be well lubricated by your arrival..
Maybe I'll just get really drunk on valentines day and tell him I think his penis is small
Is there a coat check? I stole 10 vases of flowers along with two bottles of champagne and I'm not sure what to do with them.
Ok she stopped using her fork and knife and is legit eating that steak using her hands.
I WOULD SERIOUSLY RECOMMEND THE SHIT THAT I AM ON RIGHT NOW
When Ben was deep throating pickles last night I actually reconsidered our relationship
He called me Kitten either just because or he figured out my old s&m life. Either way huge turn on.
Hooked up with another cop last night. Think I am renaming my vagina "dispatch"
Randomize
