..now you can marry chaz and be in cher's family..
yeah n i dont have to pretend to be into chicks to do it now...
I wish life had little blips of pornography
you drank a bottle of vodka and then while throwing up in my toilet you kept reminding me our hs reunion was in 2 yrs and it was time to start getting thin again anyway
just fed a duck at the lake a weed brownie. it hasnt moved in 20 minutes.
Just bought a handle of vodka with the excuse of "just in case we drink tonight"
I had a dream that our used condom started talking to me. I told me that I did an amazing job, and told me that it saved me. From aids.
He kept telling me how extraordinarily clean my ears were.
Don't worry about it. Anal sex isn't always sunshine and wildflowers.
Was it a good night or a bad night when you have to apologize to someone the next day for trying to fuck them with a turtle?
But he buys me breakfast and goes down on me THATS HARD TO FIND
the reason i can drink whatever i want and you have a limit is because whiskey will never make my pussy not work
I need a light and a towel. ive got cum in places ive never had cum before.
YAS. BRING CRAB.
You sat outside petting a picture of your cat for hours... not even the real thing... just a picture.
april was a good month for me, sexually...doubled my number, had a threesome, fucked a girl for the first time and two different boys in one night. there should be a medal
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