Apparently having him hold an open book in front of me while i'm blowing him doesn't count as studying...
it was like, one of those nights where you keep going back to the fridge because you just can't get full. except, with sex.
were lost, were cold and we don't know what to do with the stray cat we found.
My goal is to upperdeck the house I'm at, because it's some girl I don't know's birthday. Welcome to adulthood, bitch.
We've only been here for 15 hours and our names are already on 2 separate police reports. We've also been given our "final warning" by the cops and hotel management.
I just dropped a paperclip into my cleavage while talking to the company president... That's an awkward moment.
Did you at least offer to let him get it out??
Maybe don't sell him so much adderall next time. The other day during finals he was convinced that he could see the "molecules of life in the air" and kept reaching up slowly to grab them.
NO MAKING MOLDS OF ANYONES GENITALS
Fine. Suck all the fun out of life.
Dude, you need better judgement.Trust me I know. I put my dick in the wrong mouths all the time
I'll be home soonish I need 4th of July sex, it's the American thing to do.
The Australian strangers convinced me to leave him behind when they started chanting Aussie Aussie Aussie, Oy Oy Oy, and told me they had a bunch of beer at their place.
i've now hooked up with two guys who have tattoos of their sister's names...so that's a reality i have to live with...
You kept asking us from the backseat if you were driving ok and then you kept talking to your hiccups and yelling at them to "stop it already!"
I'm turning into an adult here.
Adults touch each other's special zones.
Well the hawks lost... so, of course, the only logical course of action was a bonfire in the middle of the street.
Randomize
