shhh. i hid the ranch dip behind the rooster. don't tell anyone that way you can find it in the morning and it won't be all eaten.
wrong number but thanks
I just used a tire swing as a toilet. I think I'm gonna pass out here so I can see the look on the first kid who uses it in the morning.
she went to type in rate my professors and rate my pussy came up in my recent searches. needless to say, i will likely be masturbating to the aforementioned site tonight.
My mom said she was relieved to see that I'd gained some weight bc she's "always worried" that I might have AIDS.
I don't get why Lindsay Lohan doesn't just blame her bad behavior on her twin sister from the Parent Trap. I mean nobodys seen her since.
I can't believe you're fucking in the bar bathroom, but everyone else can, and they're really proud.
you have failed as an in class drinking partner.
Let's get really high and wear fake mustaches and try not to laugh at each other...
I just want you and your enormous dick to be my fucking rebound so we can move on with our lives
Didn't pick classes because we were out all weekend...only open course is "alcohol and drug problems". Fucking ironic.
Life should not be this hard with a dick this big.
Because you put the dick in ridiculously amazing boyfriend. And you deserve to have nice things happen to your penis. That's why.
I just peed on myself the semester has officially began.
What, That's like a total 7 inches of cock and 6 are from Joe. Don't be mad at me because you had the lamest orgy ever.
I think my stomach is breaking up with me. It's giving me back everything I ever gave it.
Randomize
