honestly, who buys weed with an unemployment check?
you.
oh yeah. preciate
It took him longer to undo my bra than he lasted..
I woke up this morning to 4 booty call texts. So i am trying to find the sign that says i like to sit on cocks so that i can take it off.
trust me, i wonder where that sign is on a daily basis.
i had 75 notifications coming from ur status. here i was thinking i had friends.
i make up for being a shitty girlfriend by being amazing in bed.
If I come back covered in mud topless and banging on your door, please have a warm towel ready for me
There's some drunk girl alone in the field, she looks like she could use some help.
Also it's only fair that you know that that girl is me.
Thats stupid. Your future is a life of less pay for the same work. Free drinks is how capitalism reimburses women for its inequality. & youre not even taking it!
Yeah, this dress is irreparably whorey. I've resigned myself to being a family scandal.
You could become Eskimo brothers with my dad. How can you pass that up? You pussy.
And by "schedule" I meant crumbled up liquor store receipt, that I wrote shit on.
I've found myself wondering why I WASN'T naked before, but I generally always know why I am naked. Except now. WHY THE FUCK ARE WE ALL NAKED
so getting blacked out last night has made my lips so beautifully red for pictures today... and they say nothing good comes from alcohol
you just don't appreciate it because you've never been arrested
Woke up with a girls naked next to me I had her thong on somehow.
Randomize