I did the walk of shame to another booty call
I don't think that should turn me on, but it does
I lost of the blow last night. Found it later in my bag labeled Fairy Dust.
I finally got laid.. you said it wouldn't happen.
Wow, nothing is more special than changing the channel and seeing the guy who groped you on Saturday night...
I NEED YOU HERE TO KNOCK THE MALT BEVERAGES OUT OF MY MOUTH
The worst decision I made last night was allowing myself to be duct taped to the ceiling
Such a good question, let's ask the alcohol gods for the answer.
Just discovered i ordered the nhl center ice package back in september, the operator said there was a note next to the time I called, indicating I may have been intoxicated while calling (no clue why but it was noted)...meaning I was drunk...meaning ill never miss another sabres game...i love me and am beaming with self pride
Besides the fact that the only male who has shown an interest in me in the last 5 months has a strange and unfortunate resemblance to fucking Frodo, I've been good thanks
Ordained minister or not I hereby renounce all moral responsibility for any and all related occurrences
Holy shit, I just successfully took and sent a boob pic AT MY DESK I have conquered an entire new level of skill.
I need to stop getting so drunk at bowling
He tried to throw up into a beer bottle. It was a complete disaster. Vomit went everywhere. It put the Bellagio's fountain to shame.
so i went to the bathroom and my thong was on sideways... i guess that solves the mystery
We somehow ended up in Oklahoma. Nick's been crapping for two hours and I'm afraid to call a doctor because who the hell knows what sort of stuff goes down in the middle of nowhere. So not a great long weekend really.
Randomize
