Is it just me or are more fat girls getting belly button piercing these days?
i was about to cum until he started doing shrek impressions.
The cop and I then joined forces to get you up off the sidewalk.
Well that's another check off the sexual bucketlist of things I never wanted to experience.
The worst decision I made last night was allowing myself to be duct taped to the ceiling
Just had a heart to heart with my John Belushi poster.
you realize you insisted on them having a dance off to korean music to determine who takes you home?
Ohh man. That was a snatch-waxer with a score to settle.
He called me skinny, I broke his garbage disposal, then denied him sex. Normal second date etiquette.
He did 5 five hand stand push ups and took off his shirt for a barbarian flex. Some girl took off her shirt and threw it at him
He asked me who my new boyfriend was and I showed him a picture of my sex toys.
I guess it's part of life. Sometimes your ex boyfriend becomes a drag queen.
Im drunk taking pregnancy tests with this really hot girl...i dont know what is happening
Last night we proved the theory that "harder" is the worst rough sex safe-word ever.
It was like he was 23 all over again. Madness. I. was. so. scared.
Randomize
