oh so you have enough money for the third eye blind concert but not enough for the morning after pill?
i love rice pilaf. whoever invented that i would give them a hug.
you googled " I want to buy a live ostrich". I'd say you were pretty wasted.
So my teacher figured out I made a drinking game out of her lecture. Once my drink was gone she let us out. Happy St. Patricks day class. Your welcome
Just bonged a beer from a vuvuzela...this place is only doing good for me
Woke up at 4:30am to my little brother shaking me. Apparently I fell asleep naked on my kitchen table waiting for the toaster to pop. 2 years of college completed and i still havent learned my drinking limit...
Dude, she told me she wanted to bang my dad. I don't know which is worse, the fact that she wants to or the fact that she told me.
I wish we knew morse code and could knock to each other through the wall
So on a scale of 1 to Friendship-Over, how mad would you be if a rando I brought home sharted on the shag carpet in the living room?
I just woke up from quarter beer tuesdays wearing 3 pairs of underwear, none of which are the ones I left wearing...2 Around my waist and one around my shoulder in an attempt at a bra. At least drunk me tries to be decent?
She asked if i could guess "what shape her carpet was". I got it wrong (christmas tree).
People were running around punching out the ceiling tiles Super Mario style.
I woke up on a navy base in a different time zone. I'm never leaving tallahassee again.
Sitting topless in my room drinking wine from a box... It's good to be back at school
party devolved into two exes battling with Cal's tiki torches, and the lawn being set on fire kinda sorta and then we all hula'ed... hulaed?
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